friendships are not planned, they just happen.

One of the best bonds a person can have in their life is true friendship. Friends give you a sense of belonging with shared interests, they motivate and encourage you, they are there for you in times of fun and celebration, and especially are there for you during hard times.

Many people have their family, romantic partners, pets, and while these are all relationships to cherish, I think a connection you share with a friend, or friends that respect and love you for who you are is rare and a bond like no other. You may not have realized how close you have gotten with someone or how much time has passed. What I value is how much I learn from the people that I surround myself with.

We are always learning and growing as people. My past experiences with friendships made me learn how people are like and the kind of friend I am. I was never a very popular person and it wasn’t easy for me initially to make friends considering how I was a bit shy, but I wanted to change that. When I entered college, I wanted to be as uninhibited with myself as possible. I ended up meeting some of the most amazing people when I was at UConn. I still to this day, consider myself very grateful to have met them.

The reason why I consider friendship so important is because I know how rare it is to have good friends. Before college, I haven’t built the kind of connection I have now with my small circle. Even when I was in school, any kind of friend I had only lasted until school was over and never beyond that.

For a friendship to work, it’s important to make time for each other or keep in contact with the other person to let them know you are there for them. Even though we all get busy with work or we have our own problems to face, knowing that you have a friend that is there for you is comforting.

before and now

One of the main things I miss the most about college was how easy it was for my friends and I to see each other. We were all doing the same thing, living in the same area, working on the same goal of graduating in time. It reminds me of a poem Rupi Kaur wrote called “Friendship Nostalgia.”

As all of us are getting older it can be harder to meet up often like it was before, but I still catch up with my friends when I get the chance too. I think the effort to make the time to meet up despite how busy we are, shows how much value and care there is in maintaining a friendship.

what are friends?

The truth is, the older you get the more difficult it can be to make friends. I feel like many people stay comfortable with the people they hang out with or are not willing to take the step to be friends with someone. Honestly, I like to meet new people and even though I am aware that not everyone will be my friend, when I sense good energy I put in some effort. Not everyone is terrible and sometimes it just takes one person to reach out for a beautiful friendship to begin.

Many times, the people who we thought were our friends but weren’t can hold us back from a new friendship. Whether that was being taken advantage of, insecurities, being talked down upon, whatever it was know that these moments teach you about what kind of friendship you don’t need. When there is someone that gets along with you, listens to you, and are there for you, these small actions can mean so much and are signs of a healthy friendship worth keeping.

This post is dedicated to my beautiful friends. If you are reading this I hope you know that I am so thankful to have you in my life! You know who you are!

If you are lucky enough to have at least one good friend, tell them how much they mean to you! Give a shout out to a friend in the comments below.